Getting Instagram and Facebook out of my life for an entire year was one of the best decisions and I 100% recommend it to everyone. I know, I know, it's where I kept up with distant friends too. Yes, I totally missed out on wedding pictures and baby announcements and engagements. Yes, I also had to let go of the business I was running on it. I missed out on following good, Christian influencers and being encouraged by their pages. I didn’t see any birthday posts on my birthday. No one saw my kids' cuteness all year unless we were together. I didn't do a fourth baby pregnancy announcement. No one knew how God was teaching me and changing me. My circle of influence shrunk. I wasn't as seen. No one sent me likes. And it was so good and healthy and worth it and I think you should do it too!
The excuses and reasons not to get off social media are SO REAL. And honestly it is beyond easy to talk yourself out of it. I know because I had contemplated it for far too long prior to last year, each time stacking up my pro-con list and weighing the cons a little heavier. Until I finally acknowledged how much it negatively impacted my time and connection with God- which really has more weight than anything on the list. I think it nearly impossible to "mind your own business and lead a quiet life" while simultaneously desiring to be seen and heard and liked by as many as possible. Until it was stripped away, I really had no idea how much of a hold these platforms had on my life or in the way I used it to find additional value and significance. When I deleted the apps and committed not to log in for the year, I thought it mostly a calling by God because of the amount of time I wasted on it and how it interfered with my relationship with Him and being present. And it was those things. But God showed me so much more than just that.
I thought being off insta would make me feel more lonely, less seen by others. I thought it would be kind of sad to not have people see the ways my kids were growing and the hilarious things they would do. I thought stuff we did or places we went might not matter as much. I dreaded being out of the know on everything going on in people's lives. I thought I would feel less significant. None of these things happened. My confidence, contentment, quality of relationships, presence, closeness with God, were all only strengthened last year. I dressed my kids in cute outfits or did fun crafts or went on fun adventures and no one knew about it and it in no way took away from what we did or how much fun we had doing it. I saw the superficiality of so much of what I thought was a gain through being on social media. The unlasting satisfaction of it all.
I also realized our (humans') obsession with being in the know of everyone's lives. We want to know. If there's drama or a breakup, we want to know. If there's a new baby or an engagement, even if we literally haven't spoken to this person in 10 years, we want to know. The people we admired in junior high, we want to see what their lives have become. The people we once disliked or judged, we want to see them now. We are obsessed with knowing. But knowing in a sense of just seeing, getting a glimpse via a photo or post. Not in seeking to know who they are. Not with the goal of meeting together and exchanging stories and building a real-ationship. Just in the picture stalking kinda knowing. I realized last year how little I really need to see into anyone's lives who I don't personally know. Because those I know, I saw, I met with, I talked to. I didn't need to see their latest announcement or pictures because I was living it with them. Or on the phone regularly if they were far. And my relationships were deepened and strengthened and more fulfilling because of it. I even connected with old friends in more personal ways that I wouldn't have otherwise. I was motivated to keep up with people personally not in a mass post hit-a-like-form. Most of the knowing on social media is superficial, but boy do we like it. And we like being "known" that way too. It's simple, non-committal, controllable, and gives a temporary feeling of being seen. Which is kind of like being known, but way less how God intended.
As I learn and see so much differently now, I have yet to log back into my instagram even though my "fast" ended 4 months ago. I have been praying through whether I will engage it again or just take what I want off it and delete it. For now, I am just staying off it, because even with all I have seen and learned, I know how quickly I can become addicted or find worth in it again. I think that is what it was designed to do, or at the very least how the enemy wants to use it. And I just don't want to give in. I keep thinking that it is a morally neutral tool though and that it can be used for good. And that people do use it for good. But for morally neutral, it is a battleground of temptation. Invitations to compare, judge, envy, think more highly of yourself, think less of yourself, seek comfort, waste time, and find identity. In the years of engaging, I cannot say using it has been a tool that led to more holiness or flourishing in my life personally, and in the last year I saw how letting it go did that. I am not confident I can successfully enter the battleground without continually falling prey. So I am continuing to seek God on it. Because there are also a lot of reasons it makes sense this day and age to have it. But at what expense? The idols of our day are unlikely to be golden calves or little statues, but we must be alert to the idols that beckon for our attention, devotion, and satisfaction. They are not worthy; only the true Eternal God is.
"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your mind and all your soul."
Making it Matter,
Laura Jones
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