Window Pains

     I hate driving my husband's truck. For one thing, it's gigantic. I have to lace up my hiking boots just to climb into the seat. And parking? What a joke. I can't help but take up four spaces because I cannot get that thing into one spot. I'm that person backing up and straightening out one hundred times only to get it down to two spaces. The main problem is I have no control over machinery that big. It feels more like the truck is driving me. It's large and in charge. But my absolute least favorite part of driving my husband's truck is the window. The window can roll down at the touch of the button, but the window will not roll back up with the touch of that same button. This has been a thing for a while now and my husband has become accustomed to never rolling it down. Anytime he goes in a drive thru, he leaves enough space to open the door and order. I, however, have not grown accustomed to this ridiculousness. So every time I drive the truck (which I rarely do because, well, I like to feel safe) I forget about this special "feature."  

    The first time it was just an accident, ya know? Like it wasn't even on my radar so going through the Starbucks drive thru, I rolled it down when I went to order. After ordering I pulled forward and pressed the button to roll it back up. And that's when I remembered, Oh yeah. It doesn't work. Now, Jonathan said he has had to fix it before and what he does is press the button over and over a minimum of 1,000 times and eventually the button will in fact send the window back up. So the rest of my time waiting for the drink, I click click click click click click click that button. Get my drink. Click click click click. Window still down. I give up. When I got home I told Jonathan I accidentally rolled the window down and tried to fix it but couldn't, and then went on a rant about how ridiculous the whole thing is. He then went outside and got the window back up by pressing the button enough times or fast enough or slow enough or whatever his trick is.

    The next time was when I was going to a midwife appointment. I don't even know why I had his truck  but I guess we traded since I was going without any kids. Now you have to get a ticket to get into the parking lot at the hospital. To get said ticket you have to open your window, so I did, and I grabbed the ticket and went to roll the window up. And that's when I remembered I needed to open the door not the window. Click click click click click. I drove to my parking spot and was a little early so I sat there, clicking fast, clicking slow, clicking til my finger got sore. Window would not budge. I left the window opened and went into my appointment. Thankfully no one broke into the truck. I drove home, returned Jonathan his truck, window opened. He was able to fix it because his truck knows its master.

    I wish I could say that was the last time, but I was leaving one day for some alone time and he needed to have my car with all the carseats so he tossed me the truck keys. I looked at him and said, "Babe, I can never remember not to open your window. Can you put caution tape over the buttons or something?" He was like, "You know not to roll it down now. Just open the door when you order." So as I leave the house I literally tell myself, Do not roll the window down. Then I start thinking about what I want to do with my time alone. I pray and talk to God and process different things happening in my life. I turn a podcast on. I pull into Starbucks. Lucky me, no line! I stop to order and I roll the window down. And immediately, I am in disbelief. HOW COULD I FORGET? 

    A couple months ago a friend and I were leaving my house super early for our half marathon race. We got everything ready to go, grabbed a banana for the road, and hopped into the truck since Jonathan was bringing the kids to cheer me on later in my car. We were three minutes down the road hopping on the highway and I'm finishing my last bite of banana. Now, I'm not one to leave trash in my husband's truck- I know better than that. And a banana peel is bio-degradable so naturally I throw it out the window. CRAP! The window is open. I can't close the window. "NO! NO! NO!" I shout. My friend jumps, "WHAT?!? What did we forget?"  And I explain the pain that is my husband's truck window. And she laughs. And I kind of laugh, kind of cry. This time is especially annoying because the truck is loud even with the window closed, but the window open, on the highway, it was like having the TV blaring static on full volume. We didn't talk much the rest of the drive, couldn't hear each other.

    Jonathan still hasn't put tape over the button so I guess we just have this little bit going now. I avoid driving the truck. Sometimes I must drive the truck. When I drive the truck, for one reason or another I cannot avoid rolling the window down. When I roll the window down, I can't fix it. Jonathan fixes it. I avoid driving the truck. And the cycle continues. Except for today. Today I was leaving to grab a coffee and have time to myself with a few books. And of course, Jonathan needed the van so I got the joy of being driven by the truck. Before leaving I warned him, "You know I can't remember to not press the window down. YOU KNOW. I'm warning you. You still want me to take it?" "Babe. I believe in you. Just remember." He walks me to the truck and I get in. As soon as I am inside he motions for me to roll the window down. I almost did it, but before I could he already had his thumbs up like, "See! You didn't roll it down." Phew. That was close. I did a mobile order for my coffee and decided I better go inside to pick it up- I knew I couldn't be trusted in a drive thru line. Also, I found a sticky note in the truck so I went ahead and covered the buttons. Unfortunately, it wasn't sticky anymore so it kept falling off but I kept laying it over just as a visual. Got my coffee. Success. Then I had my time reading at the church and drove home. And for the first time, I returned the truck with the window up. This is a big deal. I conquered. I would like to thank my parents for life, my kids for giving me "mom brain", and Jonathan for giving me too many second chances and believing in me when I didn't believe in myself. The window is up. And hopefully I won't have to drive the truck again anytime soon- wouldn't want to ruin my streak! 

Making it Matter,

Laura Jones